i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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