Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
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