tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize