somebody snuck up and got me drunk
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
