Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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