At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Randomize
