Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
it's like iHOP with fire
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
