Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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