I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
