i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
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