Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
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