We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
