I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
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