This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
