End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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