Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
