your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
