also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
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