Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
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Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
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