my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
