SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Sober January is a disaster.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So many bounce houses so little time
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Randomize