i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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