I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
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