Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
