remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Hippo gnu deer
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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