just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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