Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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