It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
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