Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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