Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
