What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
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