just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize
