dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Randomize
