things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
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