There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
