so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize
