I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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