he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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