no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
