If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
