speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Randomize