okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
they call him Oral-B. enough said
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
