it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
When are your genitals available?
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
