just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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