I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
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