I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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