Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
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