the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Randomize
