you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
