No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
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